Why I Won’t Reinvent Myself in 2015

Why I Won't Reinvent Myself in 2015

As I was tidying up this morning I picked up a magazine and the big title was Reinvent Yourself in 2015.  Yesterday as I scrolled through Facebook and several of my favorite websites I saw blog after blog sharing their resolutions for the things they want to change for the New Year.

I admit I had toyed with the idea of putting out a blog myself on this very topic, yet I couldn’t muster the enthusiasm to do it.  Then today it hit me, and I mean it really hit me as I tossed that magazine into the recycling bin.

The reason I couldn’t find the desire to write my list of how I was going to be a new me in 2015 is because there was nothing wrong with the 2014 version of me.  In fact, I have spent many decades of living, screwing up, making poor choices, making right choices, and learning from my mistakes to become the self confident, wine loving, foul mouthed smartass that I am today.  And you know what?  I like me.  I like me just fine!

I wasn’t always a confident smartass bitch.  Oh no, once upon a time I was a timid little mouse who cared way too much what other people thought about me.  I wanted to please everybody.  I wanted to be everyone’s friend.  I trusted everyone to be a good friend in return and got burned more times than I can count.  Don’t even ask me about high school! I spent most of my 20’s and a small part of my 30’s feeling worthless.

It took a failed marriage to an abusive guy to teach me that I don’t have to take abuse from anyone…ever!

It took me getting stabbed in the back and betrayed for me to learn to recognize a real friend.

It took me putting my foot in my mouth repeatedly to learn that I didn’t have to voice out loud ALL the thoughts in my head.  (It’s better to save those thoughts and share them with a glass of wine with those real friends I mentioned.)

It was by needing help that I learned it was okay to ask for help.

Could I stand to lose a few pounds?  Sure, but I am much more interested in being healthy and having more energy to keep up with my boys than being skinny.  My hubby loves me just the way I am, curves and all.

Even if I do lose some weight my stomach will always be a mess.  It is covered in stretch marks that resemble the painted flames on a Harley Davison.  For the record I earned my stretch marks, every last one of them.  They are a reminder of the infertility that I struggled with for two years to conceive my first child.  They are a reminder of the miracles that can happen when you finally let it go and put it in the hands of a higher power.

Does this mean that this is it?  Am I done growing and changing as a woman?  Not at all.  Hopefully I have another four or more decades ahead of me to continue this journey called life.  With more mistakes comes more knowledge.  With more living come more opportunities for happiness and even sadness, but it only by knowing sadness that we can truly appreciate the happy.

So if I can share one message with you this 2015, it’s that you are already perfect.  You don’t need a list to make yourself a better self.  You will have that happen to you quite naturally with the passage of time.  Love your curves, wrinkles and stretch marks for the badges of honor that they are, proof of a life lived, challenges faced and met, smiles formed.

If you chose to go on a diet this January, do it because you want to be healthy, not because you want to fit in a different pair of jeans.  If you do make a resolution make it to carve out more time for yourself.  Make a resolution not to carry guilt over the past or worry what others think about you.  Tell the negative people in your life to get lost.  Make a resolution to cut yourself a little slack and smile more.

Have a happy, safe, & healthy New Year!


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A Tired Mom’s New Year’s Resolutions

A Tired Mom's New Year's Resolutions

I tend to be a complicated person.  At times I am sentimental, at times I get on a soap box and become a little bossy, often I am bitchy and snarky, and sometimes I crack my own self up.  So not surprisingly my New Year’s resolutions ended up being a mix of all of the above.

So without further ado, here are my serious, not so serious, and little bit bitchy resolutions.

On a Serious Note  

  • Create one heck of a teacher portfolio to help me take my career down a new path.
  • Too actually call people on my phone and speak to them besides just sending out a quick text message.
  • Chill out.  (This will be the HARDEST resolution for me to try to keep.)
  • Finish writing my book so that perhaps I can take my career in a truly different path!
  • Try not to get so hung up about the little things that I fail to enjoy the big things.

Not So Serious 

  • I will stop gaining weight.  Since I know I will be too busy to actually try to loose weight my goal is simply to maintain the status quo.
  • Spend more money on the Mega Millions and Power Ball jackpots, just in case that new career path thing fails to work out I’ll need a plan B.
  • I will get more sleep this year by secretly giving both boys a crushed up melatonin in their milk at dinner time.  Go ahead, judge, I don’t care!!
  • This is the year I will get serious about watching more cute baby and cat videos on YouTube!
  • I will finally carve out some time to make something awesome and Pinterest worthy with all my wine corks.

A Little Bit Bitchy 

  • I will get more exercise by lifting my middle finger more often to the crappy drivers I deal with day in and day out during my hour long commute to work.
  • I will wave and smile at the neighbors and invite them over for a drink or two when they are clearly judging me for the number of empty wine bottles in my recycling bin.
  • I will speak to my teenager using the same tone and whiny voice he speaks to me with.  I will also roll my eyes with greater exaggeration and stomp my feet as I walk away.
  • I will try to be more offensive because apparently pissing people off gets you more followers than providing humorous and somewhat helpful content.
  • I will put exposed electrical wires at the base of the toilet in the boy’s bathroom.  Every time they miss the bowl they will get ZAPPED!  Think of it as Pavlov’s Classical Conditioning, only instead of rewards for ringing a bell they will get shocked for peeing the floor.


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